Sometimes we want to be seen by others, while other times we want to hide. When the desire not to be seen is stronger than our desire to be outstanding, we limit our success.

As I looked down from the top of the parking structure, I noticed all the people, with their own chaotic lives, behaving in a very orderly manner. The signs and lights of a street had so much power that they automatically produce compliance. Even a simple line in the ground has the authority that we are afraid to cross it.

Why should we be afraid? It’s not a person who can actually do it something. Even if you are alone at the dead of night, waiting at a red light, do you dare to defy the authority of the light? Or do you sit there, waiting obediently for the light to change, when there is no other reason except the color of the light?

For some strange reason, we often accept the authority of symbols as signs for what we ought to do. These signs convey what we should pay attention to and what we should ignore. These symbols can range from signs, lights, and even clothes.

How Clothes Affect Your Visibility

Clothes are an important marker used to quickly analyze our response to people. They can mark your groups, status, and even your profession. Robert Cialdini, former professor of psychology, found that simply wearing a lab coat is enough to boost your authority. Certain clothes can make people pay attention to you, but there are some clothes that make you invisible.

Despite the amount of confidence you portray, if you do not dress the part to fit the expectations of others, you will naturally draw attention to yourself. One method for infiltration into restricted areas is to become a “gray man,” which is to dress in a manner that is often ignored by society (such as a postal worker or a repair man). No one will question you because they assume you are there for a professional reason.

Safety in the Crowd

There are clothes that make you stand out and clothes that make you invisible, but most of the time we are stuck somewhere in the middle. Most will wear nice clothes that are fashionable, but not so far on the edge that people will begin to ask questions. Too many questions is a burden when people constantly stop you (like when you wear Vibrams Five Finger shoes).

There is safety in the crowd. Be too far on the edges and you become a target. Do you ever wonder why most cars are nice, but not too exciting? With the amount of money for a development of a car, I doubt it is a lack of talent or resources. I am sure that an exciting car would not cost much more to produce, but I have a feeling an exciting car would not sell as well. It makes you stand out. It isn’t a safe choice.

Being Outstanding is to Stand Out

The most common advice I hear about careers is to “do something you’re passionate about.” How can you be passionate when you are paying attention to response of others? Do you ever overhear a conversation on your interests, but find yourself holding back to not overwhelm the others? I’ve been learning to run, play, and explore more lately because they are passions that have been suppressed.

There is a lot of social pressure not to be successful and it can hold you back when you are perfectly capable of achieving more. Achievements beyond the norm are often hidden to fit in with peers, because it will show that you are not equal. We must take care not to seem over eager, over excited, or to put too much effort into our work.

To be outstanding is, but its very roots, to stand out. Convention is understood. Being unconventional causes people to ask questions. People will look to you for answers. Questions lead to change, but success is in movement, not in standing still.

Vulnerability in Visibility

One thing that artists and musicians feel is a sense of vulnerability as they present their work to others. They are vulnerable because they are passionate about their work. It is very personal, but it is on display for all to see. They can see you and you can be affected.

In class, the fear of vulnerability causes many to avert their eyes to avoid being called on. Even if the student knows the answer, many will still try to remain hidden in the crowd. It’s strange that people desire a calling, but fear being called upon.

When passions are restrained and fears reign, our true potential is held back. When was the last time you felt like jumping out of your seat, with your hand raised, yelling “pick me! pick me!”?